Mid-Service Crisis

Mid-service crisis is: crying on the bus ride home while wedged in between two very large men (and trying to hide it from them).  Here’s a tip: if you put your head against the seat in front of you, you might be able to appear as if you are just sleeping.  Here’s another tip: inexplicable sniffling may give you away.

I swear I’m OK.

I think everyone goes through this to some extent: when the nostalgia of home is coupled by a milestone and amplified by lots of alone time, things start to eat at you.  Piropos. Noise. Loneliness. Dirt. Cold water. Sometimes no water. Trash. The inability to form a line. The inability to notice that I am carrying a lot of heavy things and I do not want to talk to you for twenty minutes about when I will be free to meet your mother because I don’t even know your name and I am sweating and have things to do.

I believe that the technical term for those who ignore social cues is “men that want to get into your pants.”

While I’m going through a bit of a rough patch, I don’t want to go home.  This will pass.  I will be busy.  I’m starting a project that I’m very excited about, which I’ll write about if it works out.  My family is coming in February and we’re going to the beach.  I am going home for vacation at the end of April.  I will be OK.  But this is a part of my service, so here it is, laid out for you, unedited, un-beautified.  It is what it is, and I will be OK.

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3 Responses to Mid-Service Crisis

  1. We just had IST and talked about Mid-Service Blues…hang in there!


  2. Mom says:

    I disagree. You will not be okay because you are okay….BRAVO! Love, Mom


  3. Clara says:

    you’re very brave, stash. Hey, remember that office episode where there’s a bat in the office and Dwight traps it in a garbage bag against Meredith’s head? That image ought to cheer you up a bit. Hang in there,pal.


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